Tuesday, April 7, 2009

my commentary.

Maybe the $40 million dollars could have been put to better use. The Orchard Road facelift noticed by only 60 out of 100 people, was completed in early March. Most people did not agree that it was the best use of $40 million dollars, and that the new installations were even dangerous. One such example is the glass panels. Teacher Joyce Tan claims that they are “impractical, especially at night, when people may get drunk and smash it or into it” The Singapore Tourism Boar, the organizer and mastermind of the makeover, has introduced numerous other changes, including new street lamps, co-ordinated street furniture, and potted flower totems.
STB’s director of tourism shopping & dining, Mr. Andrew Phua, explained that “the glass panels are designed for safety and are heat-strengthened. In the event that the glass is hit by hard objects, it will not shatter but will remain intact with cracks on the panel to mitigate potential dangers to the public”.
Mr. Phua goes further to state that “infrastructure works alone” cannot be expected to change overnight. He also says that the makeover can only be completed with a diverse and exciting retail experience “offering variety and complementary dining and entertainment”.
Some people, however, feel that too much money was spent on this makeover and that the changes made were not very noticeable. “The Singapore Tourism Board should be thriftier about it, given the economic situation,” Vithiya Subramaniam, a 19 year-old student, says. Haryannie Hasshim, another student, says that she has only noticed changes around the Ngee Ann City Area, and thinks that they are only worth $1 million. However she feels that it is better & more spacious now. Chris Ang, a 28 year-old financial advisor, shares the same view and thinks that it’s good that the walkway has been widened. Ivan Choo, a 20 year-old student, think that the $40 million is an investment well-spent as Orchard is the primary shopping belt of Singapore.
Housewife Jennifer Symons-Leith thinks that the money could be better spent cleaning up the place instead. She thought, that the pavement looked so dirty that it was flooring from three decades ago. Retiree Rosy Ong also thinks that there should not be more greenery in Singapore that will be constantly maintained.
The $40 million could definitely have been put to better use.

4 comments:

  1. Seems too short, but the format as a commentary is very clearly presented.

    You might want to compare the changes in the orchard road to the changes in RI after the $41million upgrading scheme.

    Arguments are taken off the articles, try and include more opinions, anecdotes etc. Good effort.

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  2. this seems more like a report of different opinions on the orchard road facelift. the reader does not get to see much of the author's point of view.

    Furthermore, the language is rather passive and it does not persuade the reader to take after the author's view (if there is even one).

    I think you should use more of the logos, pathos and ethos to persuade the reader. Also, don't just quote evidence without points to persuade the reader.

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  3. Haha probably an article off somewheree why is everybody so serious about giving comments? Hm.

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  4. Lol. You lifted most of this from the article provided... Try to provide more of your own opinion.

    ReplyDelete